The catalog

Every envelope is $4 flat with first class postage included. No return address, nothing inside that points back to you.

Browse our envelopes

Their premium membership is confirmed. In full color. On the envelope.

Real men gettin' real dirty. Thanks for signing up. Payment due.

Thank you for booking! Trip details enclosed.

Congrats, we found their soulmate. He is currently incarcerated.

Their mail carrier will read this one twice.

Enjoy your natural clippings.

Thank you for swinging by. Upside-down pineapples included.

Thanks for attending. See you next year.

Keep it in the blood line.

Making it moist since 81'

Your patented cream shipment has arrived